Unhappy birthday Singapore

COUNT ON ME OUT SINGAPORE

You robbed me of two years of my prime;

They are gone, they are gone…

You put me through a living hell;

Still more to come, still more to come…

My safety was compromised by your recklessness and lies

You almost caused me to be among those who died

Still more to come, still more to come…

You rejected me for every government job

Kept advertising yet claimed you had “a good crop”

For a decade, not a call, not an interview at all

I was a perfect match for one but you ignored

Still more to come, still more to come…

Count me out, Singapore

Count me out, since you have shut the door

I became an employee of a private company

Got used and dumped by foreigners in my own country

Still more to come, still more to come…

Count me out, Singapore

Count me out, Singapore

Count me out, since you have shut the door

Count me out, Singapore

Forget it Singapore, Singapore!

HOME HELL

Whenever I am feeling low

I look around me and I know

There's no place of solace here for me wherever I have tried to go

I remember it's called "fine city" - pay and pay more and more

Gave up the two years which risked my life, suffering through Singapore

This is hell truly

Where I can only be

Where my dreams keep shattering

Where the nightmares never end

This is hell surely

As my senses tell me

This is where I'll never be well

For this is where I know it's hell

When there are troubles to go through

Another quickly starts anew

It is shocking to discover that leaders sue their people too

And our sacrifices are for trash which has came ashore

Just like the two years which risked my life - sucks as always, Singapore

This is hell truly

Where I can only be

Where my dreams keep shattering

Where the nightmares never end

This is hell surely

As my senses tell me

This is where I'll never be well

For this is where I know it's hell

For this is where I am in hell.

Ask not what your country can do for you...

...ask what it can do to you.

1. Basic Military Training (BMT)

Adverse Conditions:

• 6 hours (max if lucky) of unrestful sleep,
• and a pathetic portion for breakfast (sometimes a single tiny miserable burger),

• at around 6am and expected to last all morning until lunch much later around 12pm.

Damage to Health:

• I was once denied rest for not running a fever,

• despite having all the other symptoms of flu,

• and was accused of trying to 'geng' (malinger).

• My stamina also dropped rapidly to an abnormal level,

• I'd gasp for air after running a mere few metres without any load,

• compared with junior college days of catching my breath by just panting several times,

• after running all the way from the bus-stop to assembly while carrying a heavy school bag.

Care for Soldiers:

• I was still reeling and too exhausted from the prior strenuous exercise,

• to run while making my way to the armskote room to return my rifle.

• Platoon Commander singled me out to be punished,

• with not only further physical strain but also open humiliation,

• and as I was struggling to "knock it down" (do push-ups) in front of everybody,

• he screamed at me a sentence forever etched in my memory "I don't care if you die!"

Hoops of Persistent Negligence:

• Medical Officer trivialised my difficulties and declared them all to be "purely psychological".

• I had to insist on a check-up and was referred to their Central Manpower Base.
• A heart murmur was detected but carelessly dismissed as "functional",

• despite it being a new symptom not present during the pre-enlistment screening.

• I had to safeguard my life by seeking help from a specialist,

• and mindfully chose a government/ public rather than private one,

• to avoid being accused of "buying letters" (fake or exaggerated diagnoses).

• I was found to have mitral valve prolapse by National Heart Centre,

• and downgraded to PES C9 status promptly without further question.

2. National Service (NS)

Empress Dowager:

• S1/ Manpower Officer asked me whether I went to Principal Staff Officers (PSOs),

• to personally remind them to collect their transport claim reimbursements.

• I replied that I didn't because my upper-study never taught me to,

• and also that they'd know since reminders were being published in Routine Orders (RO).

• She said that they might not see it,

• so I asked wasn't it "every serviceman's responsibility to read RO"?

• She replied "no arguments!"

Escalation for Clarification:
• After obeying her commands I emailed Commanding Officer,

• to seek an answer to my question and also ask whether it'd be fair,

• to fault or punish me if I failed to remind PSOs to collect their reimbursements.

• He confirmed that it was indeed every serviceman's responsibility to read RO,

• but presumed that due to the nature of their work,

• she might've wanted to offer them a service,

• in which case she should've specifically tasked someone to do it.

• He gathered from the way I wrote that she didn't and instead simply expected me to know,

• in which case it might not have been fair to me,

• but "if otherwise" (meaning if she did task me and I refused),

• then I "did not comply with lawful orders".

Ending with Disappointment:

• I responded to confirm that she didn't task me beforehand and to share that I was surprised,

• because by offering them a service which belittled their abilities,
• it'd appear as if she herself had lost faith in their competence as PSOs,

• for how were they supposed to handle affairs involving the whole unit,

• if they couldn't even remember such simple personal matters.

• I assured him that I would not refuse to comply with lawful orders,

• would instead remind the PSOs to collect their own money,

• and thanked him for his enlightening advice.

3. In-Camp Training (ICT)/ Reservist

Sacrifice:

• I was still on probation at a new job and so could apply for deferment,

• which would push this last ICT past my statutory age and effectively let me miss/ escape it,
• but eventually decided to withdraw my deferment application,
• in anticipation of one last opportunity for positive closure,

• should things have changed for the better as my new S1 seemed nice,

• and in support of the camp's KPI/ goal of maximum reservist turnout.

Reward:

• I was unfairly charged for the very first time ever,

• and punished for essentially not having psychic powers,

• to know about an offence which was supposed to be expounded on,

• during a briefing that I was actually on my way to attend.

Circumstances:

• SMS stated vaguely to "not bring in any camera enabled devices even your in car camera",

• it was not even indicated on the SAF100 full official notification,

• my previous ICT was 13 years ago (in 2006),

• nevertheless I had a sense to leave my iPhone at home,

• but my IVC could not be removed without risking damage to the windscreen,

• so I not only disabled it by unplugging the wires but also used a pouch to enclose it.

• When the guard asked what was inside I answered candidly and he stopped my car,

• so I did not even enter/ drive into camp.

• As a result, I missed the initial half of the briefing,

• which my buddy said covered this rule in-depth for 20-30 minutes.

Reminiscences and regrets from when I was young

Let's go chronologically...

1. Fairfield Methodist Primary School

Pri 1:

• My form teacher ordered me to retrieve all the spelling books from a low cabinet,
• which took some time as I had to squat down fully and lift the heavy stack,
• but she thought that my slowness was due to me searching for my own book to place on top,
• so she pulled my hair (her usual punishment) because there it really was.

Indifference:

• I'd never have dared to argue back as a kid of that age anyway,
• especially in the face of such a freak coincidence.

Pri 2(?):

• My 3-years-older brother in the same school had shared with me about how,

• when he was buying a piece of cake from the drinks-stall,

• they simply grabbed the nearest one of a different type/ flavour and handed it to him,

• insisting “一样的” ("it's the same") and made him pay up.

• I was determined to learn a lesson from his encounter and not be bullied.
• There was once I sighed to my friend beside me when they ran out of orange juice,
• the drinks-stall auntie chided “哎呀什么，卖完了嘛！” ("aiya what, sold out already mah!"),

• so I snapped back “什么哎呀什么？！都不是跟你讲话！！” ("what aiya what?! I wasn't even talking to you!!")

Satisfaction:

• Felt good to see her shocked face as I then beckoned my friend to walk away together.

Pri 3(?):

• My "enemy" classmate forgot to bring an item (eraser?) for art class,
• I had an extra which the art teacher asked if I could sell to this classmate,
• I agreed for 60 cents which was the cost price,
• but it later crossed my mind that he was my "enemy" so I raised to $1,

• but the teacher forbade it and forced me to sell to him at 60 cents.

Regret:

• I should've refused and told the teacher that it's my decision as the item belongs to me.

Pri 4:

• My form teacher confiscated my diary for writing it in class,

• threatening to take me to the principal if I didn't hand it over.
• She later called out to me while reading it and I rushed over,

• but by the time I reached her she closed it and asked if I wrote anything bad about anyone.

• I was seething and seriously considering whether to explode with rage,

• but ended up just answering by lying "no".

Regret:

• (Un)fortunately she didn't expose or challenge my lie,

• because I was a heartbeat away from (and really regret not) snatching my diary back,

• yelling at her in front of the whole class something along the lines of ,

• "what I write is none of your business!" and "how dare you read my diary!" (whichever first),

• and that it was "despicable" (yes I knew this word and remember being ready to use it),

• then finishing off with the exact line "you want to see the principal?! let's go!!"

Pri 5:

• My Chinese teacher wanted me to move my desk to make way for my "enemy" classmate,

• which I felt was more than or not necessary,

• I thought that she was unfair and biased towards him,

• so I complied reluctantly with a lot of loud banging,
• but she noticed that I was on the verge of tears,

• and gently told me to “去厕所洗脸” ("go to the restroom and wash your face").

Gratitude:

• Her letting me cool off and come back after calming down helped a lot.

• To this day I still remember what she wrote in my autograph book,

• which turned out to be a proverb “买马要看口齿，交友要摸心底” ("before buying a horse look at its mouth and teeth; before befriending someone understand their heart")

2. Fairfield Methodist Secondary School

Sec 3/4:

• My English/ form teacher forgot how to spell "hieroglyphics",

• and taught the class that "annihilate" was pronounced as "an-NEE-HEE-late",

• "but Americans would pronounce it as an-NAI-HEE-late",

• even though both are wrong which she should've known,

• because during my part of the group presentation I enunciated it as "a-NAIA-late",

• which is the only correct pronunciation and has a silent "h".

• She also displayed blatant favouritism while handing out report books to the class,
• by announcing "those of you who came over to my house that day, I forgot to give you your 'angpows', please come and collect them from me later".

Dismay:

• Unfit to be a teacher.

Sec 4:

• My geography teacher blindly took the side of her pets,

• when they tried to push the responsibility (and cost) of printing out the group project to me.
• I'll never forget her verbatim remark "these are the people I trust",
• as she declared how the project "means nothing to me" and that she could just dump it into the bin.

Regret:

• Another deep regret not retorting "well it doesn't matter to me either, I am only here for the O-Levels" before swaggering off.

• To give the devil its due I concede that her pedagogic skills were excellent,

• because all her students must've gotten A1 in their O-Levels,

• since even I shot all the way up from F9,

• but I'd still maintain that she failed terribly as an educator.

3. Anglo-Chinese Junior College

Incompetencies:

• General Paper teacher from the US who boasted "my English is unquestionable",

• taught the class that the noun for "infamous" was "infamousness" (it's "infamy"),
• and blemished my otherwise flawless essay by circling in red a word she didn't understand.
• me: "may I know what's wrong with this?"

• her: "what does this word mean?" (inculpate)

• me: "to incriminate"

• her: "oh, to make culpable"

• me: "yup"

• her: "ok"

Bemusement:

• Why she would prefer embarrassing herself over using a dictionary is beyond me.

4. Perth Institute of Business and Technology (Australia; now Edith Cowan College)

This and my exchange program to Kobe University in Japan are my best school experiences.

5. Curtin University (Australia)

Blunders:

• I decided to change course from Accounting to Business Administration,

• which was offered only at another campus/ city,

• but whose individual lectures/ tutorials were actually available at my current campus/ city,
• which I therefore obtained both verbal and written approvals from the coordinator to attend,
• and also informed him that changing my course was irreversible,

• because it involved withdrawing from Accounting subjects,

• which were prerequisites of other prerequisites.

• Towards end semester the office suddenly informed me that the coordinator was wrong,

• and he came up with lame excuses trying to wiggle out of what he previously confirmed.

• The office only relented after I threatened to drop out and return to my home country,

• where I would share my predicament as widely as possible.

• I said "maybe I shouldn't learn business administration from an institution which can't even manage its own administration properly."

Consolation:

• Imagine the ordeal of having to move to a different city if I hadn't stood my ground.

 

Discrimination:

• Japan House residence hall was stated as prioritising students of Japanese language,

• but the housing manager did the opposite for local Aussies who weren't studying Japanese,
• claiming that as freshmen they had a greater need to live on campus,

• which is lame considering that international students are the ones in a foreign country.
• So he offered me a place in another residence hall,

• which means that there were rooms for those Aussies to live on campus in the first place,

• and despite me being the one studying Japanese.

• In the previous semester when I was living in Japan House,

• one of these Aussies who wasn't studying Japanese even had the nerve to complain,

• that nobody should use Japanese to speak or write on the message board,

• because she couldn't understand what they were communicating between themselves.

Indignation:

• Racism is very much alive at Curtin.